Florida Grants ESPN 'Unprecedented' Access To Gators Football

"Hey, Will, let's see if we can show ESPN everything and nothing all at once... (via GatorZone)

The "unprecedented" brains-to-bowels access ESPN got to Florida's football program on Monday wasn't exactly revelatory. It may not have even been unprecedented: That was SportsCenter anchor John Buccigross' word, and may not cover all access given by all football teams, but just the notoriously clammy Florida Gators. But it was satisfying.

I mentioned one reason why that's the case on Monday — access for some is exposure for others — but barely touched on the fan excitement the blitz generated. Twitter lit up, and people got excited about a team that has a substantial number of question marks; heck, I'm a jaded ESPN viewer and I loved it, despite my total consciousness of the absurdity of "access" translating to little more of news value than the amount of Gatorade the Gators will consume over the course of the next month.

Hit the jump for a recap with more photos and a few videos from ESPN's tour of Florida.

First and foremost: You can find photos from this GatorZone gallery, but any reproduction, even that photo up at the top, counts as unlawful reproduction. (Email me, IMG rep.) So here's a list of captions that count as punchlines given before the joke.

• "I came to Florida for the four-slice toaster."
• "This mic, it's safe, right?"
• "FRESHMEN! THIS IS KICK COVERAGE! YOU WILL DIE ON IT! I THINK THIS IS FUNNY!"
• "So I says to Moses, 'Open it up again! I gotta get through!'"
• ...okay, no joke here, just look at what I think is Jeff Driskel's shoulder/arm on the left.
• "Yeah, I've seen Driskel's arm."
• "These are my skinny shorts."
• "DON'T LOOK BACK DON'T YOU EVER LOOK BACK!" (throws interception)
• "FINISHED HIM!"
• "Really, again? My product is seeping into my brain stem, guys."

All videos via ESPN from this autoplay minefield at Only Gators, and they will probably be set to do the same here. Beware!

In this one, John Brantley says he's excited about Charlie Weis' offense because "He likes to run the ball a lot." That should tell you plenty about John Brantley.

Here is Will Muschamp yelling at Mack Brown for fumbling in a practice drill. Sorry, wait, lemme fix that.

HERE IS WILL MUSCHAMP YELLING AT MACK BROWN FOR FUMBLING IN A PRACTICE DRILL!

That feels like a faithful interpretation of Muschamp's intensity.

Only Gators really did a fantastic job aggregating all of this, so I can't recommend that recap more. There's more at ESPN's SEC blog, too.