clock menu more-arrow no yes mobile

Filed under:

Don't tase me bro!

The following was originally posted on our other website, The Sporting Orange. We figure maybe if we keep saying this jerk's name, he'll get all the attention he wants quickly (like Deadspin) and slowly fade away. In the process, he'll probably ruin UF, so we'll have to win another title to get that goodwill back. UF: first in basketball, first in football, last in public decorum. I'm pissed that this kid will get the same degree I got. -mlm

Protect The Tasered Kid! He's An Offensive Genius!

First off, let me just say as a College of Journalism and Communications grad at the University of Florida, I am honored that one of our own has been plastered all over the news. I mean, first we win back-to-back-to-back major NCAA championships, hang 59 on Tennessee, and now we fight with cops in front of a US Senator and hide behind the first amendment? Yes! Make us proud Andrew Meyer!

More importantly, Andrew Meyer is an offensive genius. Only Andrew Meyer was smart enough to point out that Urban Meyer's spread offense was terrible. Check out Andrew Meyer's epic analysis after the Tennessee game in 2005.

The offense could not have been more basic. Every run was straight up the middle, every pass attempt was to the same tired hook routes. I was screaming during an entire quarter for the Gators to try a slant (which they eventually did, for a 20-yard gain), or a play-action pass (they didn't even attempt one.) They managed only a pair of field goals the two times they were given outstanding field position.

Wow! In the third game of Urban's tenure, Andrew Meyer knew this offense would amount to nothing! I'm still trying to figure out how Urban didn't hear Andrew Meyer screaming for those slants. Andrew Meyer even wanted former UF backup Josh Portis to play. Andrew Meyer is right about that because Portis, despite cheating on quizzes at Maryland, is really impressive in practice.

I mean, who cares if it appears Andrew Meyer had someone video tape this for Andrew Meyer's website, or if Andrew Meyer appeared to act like an idiot only on camera. We salute you Andrew Meyer; Offensive Genius and Political Protester!

(Andrew Meyer has made The New York Times and a t-shirt. I hope Andrew Meyer gets something out of this ordeal before Andrew Meyer's clock hits 15 minutes. Too bad Andrew Meyer is upset with the amount of attention Andrew Meyer is getting.)